And for those of you with children - do you ever look back and wish maybe you hadn't had them?Are you childfree and happy with that decision?
Immensely happy for not having kids.
I just don't like them, which doesn't help. I feel no need to reproduce. I don't look at parents with kids and go 'aw I want one'. I just think 'you poor sods, when did you last go to the cinema/have a lie-in/go away for a long weekend somewhere nice/go out for an impromptu drink with friends/not be tired/ not smell of wee or sick/afford to buy yourself something nice?
I'm sure they can be rewarding if you really want to do that sort of thing. I'm almost too old to have kids safely, I persuaded my doctor to let me be sterilised a few years ago. Luckily I found a partner who also dislikes kids with a vengence. If we hear one screaming in the supermarket we do simultaneous wincing. We also believe that they shouldn't be allowed in restaurants and most parents don't seem to be able to get their kids to behave these days.
It's not selfish - it's wholly responsible. I don't like them therefore I should not bring one into the world. If I had ever got pregnant when I was younger I would have had an abortion. It wouldn't have been fair on the kid and I would have hated it for ruining my life. Yes I could have given it away but why should I have risked my health for that?
Sorry for the length - you've found one of my favourite rants!Are you childfree and happy with that decision?
I am 28 and the thought of kids has never, ever appealed to me. Selfish as it sounds, I like to treat myself to the nice things in life and would never want to give that up. Things may change over time, but I can't see it happening. I know that typically, women should start to avoid having children after the age of 35, as the risk of a defect increases greatly. I have 7 years left to decide, but I know that if the next 7 years come around as fast as the last 7 have, then I really don't have that much time.
I am 49 years old and childless, not through a conscious choice, but I have never met 'the one' never got married. I suppose I could have got pregnant and had a child that way. But to me if I had a child, I wanted a husband and family - not to be a struggling single mother on welfare. So I suppose in that respect I am happy I am childless. But given a choice I would have loved children and yes I do feel a large bit is missing from my life
I'm only 25, so I don't know if I'm the target audience for your question, but I know several people my age who do have children and I don't wish I was them - ever. The idea of giving up my social life and normal activities is terrifying, not to mention the financial and emotional requirements of raising a child. I'd rather wait til I'm happily married, in a nice house, making good money before I reproduce. And then I see commercials with babies in white shirts getting jelly and all other colorful, sticky substances all over them and I start to reconsider.
i have 2 children and i had my first at 22 i dont ever regret them because they changed my world God for the waaay better and they make me so happy the sound of their laughter makes my heart soar...i do look back and wish I had waited so that i could provide for them better...like i wish i had went to college and things like that but i am gonna grow with them and when they are grown i will still be young enough to have fun with them and still do fun stuff!
I'm 28 - I have never had a maternal bone in my body - Kids just do not interest me (even close friend and families children) I am with the perfect partner and due to get married. And although my partner loves the thought of children, my maternal instinct have not yet kicked in - I really hope they do before i'm too old and have regrets - but for the time being the thought of children is as so for in the future, I just can not imagine being a mum - even writing me and mum in the same sentence feels totally weird
well. i have three boys, the first one was planned. i only ever wanted one child. then i went on birth control and ended up pregnant again. i was so upset when i first found out, and the pregnancy and birth were very hard. i had to be bedridden for months because i started dilating early. i gained weight and was soo sad. but i had him and it was wonderful. then went back on birth control, and got pregnant again. much easier pregnancy and after i had him i was so in love with all my children, i don't regret having them. but i didn't want anymore so i got my tubes tied. don't you know it, i got pregnant again. the day i was going to the doctors to find out what i could do about it i lost my job and had a miscarriage, i was so devistated about it. alot of heartache and pain to have my children that i really didn't want, but i would never ever ever trade them in for anything. they drive my crazy all the time, but when you do something that makes them smile or laugh and when you come home from a hard day and they are there so happy to see you and smother you in hugs, it's the best feeling in the world.
Oh to be honest....I think we all have those moments....when we are stressed and things are tight and we are restless. It is normal to always wonder if you made the right decision and if you should have gone a different path. No way can you live your life (which is a very long time) and not wonder what would have been.
But that is ok to daydream...and wonder. You would not be human if you didn't.
When it all comes down to it...when the end of the day is there...look at those children. REALLY...would your life have been better? Would it have had as many riches and smiles and purpose in life?
ONCE someone is in your life and they have your heart.....your life is never the same without them. They are integrated into your soul....they are part of you.
The only real regrets I have in life are that I didn't give enough of me. NO matter how hard life was and that there was no time due to extreme circumstances....I should have MADE time. Hind sight is always 20/20.
child-free but not by choice. I have grown to be happy(?, meh, maybe more accepting of the situation) with that outcome. A small part of me will always regret not having children but I fill my life in other areas and get my kid fix from other family members and volunteering w/ children.
I am 20 years old. I don't want to ever have children. I think if i don't have children, my burden would be smaller than those who did have them and wish that they hadn't.
This goes back to the principle of ';the grass is always greener on the other side.';
The risk and pain seem low on my side.
At almost 40 I thought I could never have children so I made myself believe I was childless and happy...after all, who wants all that responsibility?
On my 40th birthday I found out I was pregnant...its the best feeling. I love being a mum. I now have a 12 year old horror who I love totally and unconditionally. Its hard work but I wouldn't swap it for anything.
Yes, I am childfree and sometimes I do think 'what if ...?' but then I encounter parents with very unruly, rude, obnoxious little brats that they bred, and think to myself that I have very cleverly avoided all that .....
The youngest of my six is 26 and working on her Masters' Degree. No, I've never regretted any of them! If I could, I'd have another.
I have 4 and consider myself very lucky, we didn't plan to have any and the first was an ';accident';. I'm glad it happened.
I have kids, and I'm glad I had them, they are the best thing ever.
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