I prefer to be childfree indefinitely. Sorry ladies.Women's options on parenting and childfree men...?
No, I'd probably fall for that man first. Me and my husband are childfree, it would not turn me off at all.Women's options on parenting and childfree men...?
I plan to remain child free, and I have no problem with men who choose the same option because its your life. No its not selfish.
I got a vasectomy when I was 24. I did however save some frozen soldiers for the right woman. I don't advertise this when I date however there are times that if the relationship is moving to the point where I give them my disposition regarding children, I gauge their reaction to my vasectomy first then later if they are ok with it I tell them that I some frozen emissaries on lay away. So far I am 0 for 2, some ladies seemed to be turned off by my vasectomy. *shrugs*
It is a very personal preference. For someone who has been wanting kids for some time, I would not marry a man who was determined not to have kids.
Choosing not to have kids does not make a person selfish, just responsible in my eyes. I would not want to bring a child into this world if my life was in total turmoil or we didn't have enough money for us to make ends meet.
There is nothing selfish with either men or women who do not want children.
If a couple are getting married, they need to agree on having a family or not.
';sorry Ladies '; ???
Is there a line of women waiting outside your door to have children with you ?
You have no reason to be mean.
Your choice is fine for you.No problems.
I'm sure womankind will survive without your seminal input.
The only dishonest thing would be if you were not up front about your wishes before you got serious in a relationship.
No one should have children if he/she doesn't want them.
I could have gone either way. My wife has 2 from a previous marriage and I have none. I love my wife way too much to ask her to have a reverse tubal for me. How long would it take me to find another woman to have a child with.
I don't want children ever. No ifs, ands, or buts about it. And it's not just a little ';phase'; I'll get over when I realize my biological clock is ticking, as many have done who once claimed to have been childfree. When I met my fiance, he always said he wanted at least 1 kid. When I explained my thinking to him, it took a little while for him to come around, but now he is as staunchly childfree as me. I would never date a man who is dead set on having kids.
As for ';selfishness,'; you first have to understand that being selfish is not necessarily a bad thing. You also have to realize that most decisions humans make in their lives have some sort of selfish motivation. I choose to go to college so I can become educated and obtain a good career. This, is by definition, selfish. However, my choice to become educated and be a productive citizen through this way has positive externality.
With that being said, choosing to be a parent is motivated by selfishness. Sure, once someone becomes a parent they (ideally) make some selfless sacrifices, but the main motivation for why people have kids is because THEY want to be a parent. Having a child would fulfill THEIR life.
If you're a good parent and your children grow up to be good and productive members of society, your choice to become a parent has positive externality, as well.
And personally, I think choosing to have kids has a better chance of being motivated by negative selfishness than choosing to not have kids.
I never ever want children. Many people underestimate me because I am still 15 years old. I am absolutely 100% against it. I don't hate children, but I only like being around them for a certain period of time. I have no maternal instincts and I find babies boring.
BUT I will be able to invest extra time and money into helping animals. I intend to be a career woman and help animals in need around the world. A dream of mine is to set up a conservation park in South America. Is that selfish that I have a dream and that I want a higher education? Many people think it is. Then I guess I am selfish, but I am definately not guilty! :D
I have no problem with childfree men, we're like minded. But I am never marrying. I choose to remain childfree and single. I honestly have nothing against people who have children or those who get married. If you want 10 children and want to get married then more power to you.
But I want to do many many things in my lifetime. I want to help animals, run a conservation park, I want lots of pets, I want to travel to 3 different countries before I die and to live on farm somewhere at some point.
I have my life planned out, and there's no room for kids or a husband.
While I really don't know how my preferences will change in the future, I'm not interested in having children at all at the moment. I suspect I'll want to remain childfree.
No problem with that at all. My husband is fine with it.
We do have a teenager who is mine from a previous marriage. But she's much more comic relief than child to him. Although, she does demand that he check on her from time to time at night while he's on World of Warcraft in order to make sure she hasn't been stolen by aliens. Damn that SciFi Channel!
I wouldn't have gone for a guy who didn't want kids because I wanted kids. It wouldn't be fair to either of us.
I want children-two to be exact. My fiance wants three. We will see how we feel after we have two, assuming we have no problems conceiving.
I see no problem with a man or a woman who does not want to have children.
Don't apologize! There is nothing wrong with not wanting kids.
I and my SO have the same view, and that is one of the reasons that we are together. I can't imagine being in a relationship with someone who wanted kids: it would be stressful and unfair to everyone concerned.
Of course you can date and marry- just be up front about how you feel. Make it clear that you don't want kids, and that is NOT going to change.
Believe me, there are women out there who feel the same way and want a partner who won't pressure them to have kids!
Good luck and best wishes.
Before I had my first child I was indifferent to becoming a parent, actually, I never had even given it much thought. My husband (boyfriend at the time) had casually mentioned that he couldn't stand kids and it never acured to me to feel threatened by that. So if I was still single and childless, I don't know, it still might not be a major issue in my life. But none the less I do have children and my husband and I could not be happier. I don't know what I would do with out them. I love them more then the word love could possibly mean. I don't think you are selfish, I think that if you do not want kids you should not have them. You don't want to end up resenting a child. However, you need to take steps to prevent this from happening, and understand that if you are engaging in sexual activity, then you should be prepared for the possibility of becoming a parent.
I think it is more selfish to have children, but still want to give up anything in your life or time for them.
I am not the type that understand people who wish to never have children however I made sure I married a man who wanted children as much as I did.
I think as long as you are very honest with the women you date so they know what to expect in any future relationship it is there choice, I know several women who have stayed child free my step mother being one.
I wanted to be childfree up until a year ago, now I want them more than anything, hope that you dont change your mind because it could cause serious problems
My husband has two children from a previous marriage. I have no children and intend to stay that way. If my husband had wanted more children, I would not have married him.
I would also like to be childfree indefinitely, but apparently no surgeon in the world is willing to help me achieve that goal. Childfree people aren't selfish. They just want different things in their lives.
I don't think it is selfish at all. I think it is wonderful they know what they want and aren't pressured by society into doing something that will hinder them and their children. I however want children, as does my husband. That is one of the many reason we married one another. I do however think it is wrong to disrespect these beliefs and desires, especially within a relationship.
i wanted kids (good thing, as i'm 33 wks pregnant!) and would not have married my husband had he not wanted children as well. i wouldn't have seen it as selfish, but it would have been a deal breaker as it obviously meant we wanted vastly different things from life.
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