Well let me qualify that 9. Two are gay, and therefore childfree by default. That leaves seven that are normal heterosexuals that have chosen not to have children. Four of the seven are “closet” childfree. That means they post pictures of other peoples kids in their cubes so nobody will bother them about it. If someone asks about the kids, they usually change the subject.
I used to be very proud to be Childfree, but the workplace has become hostile toward us. Gays are protected under the law. Those of us that are Childfree and not gay are not protected.
I will be changing jobs soon. How should I address my political stance on having children? People will ask. People will gossip.How do, or would, YOU handle being Childfree in the workplace?
Tell them you don't feel right bringing children into the world the way it is. Or you could say you tried to have children but couldn't. They just don't need to know the reason you couldn't is because you don't want to. Don't feel bad about your choice.How do, or would, YOU handle being Childfree in the workplace?
Umm, FYI, LGBT people are not child-free ';by default,'; but by choice. Our parts work just fine, thanks.
What exactly is happening that you need protection from? It sounds like you have a big chip on your shoulder. Is it imaginary?
Post any pictures you want. There's no one stopping you. However, please stop demeaning LGBT people.
God makes people to be LGBT and straight; left- and right-handed, and with all sorts of eye colors. All are ';normal.';
When you get physically assaulted on the street, or discriminated against for jobs or housing, or killed, then I'd say you have something to complain about, like LGBT people. I sincerely hope that you never have to suffer anything CLOSE to this.
Wow, I'm sorry to hear that this is such an issue! I and a few others are child free (by choice) where I work, and people just accept that. Or if they don't, they at least don't get nasty about it.
Find a new workplace where people aren't so judgmental. And if you're truly being discriminated against, sue!
It's no ones' business but yours. When you tell people rude enough to ask that you have no children, you should simply leave it at that. I can't believe anyone would care about your reproductive decisions as grown and responsible adults!
Personally, I'm very open about my choice to be childfree. I suppose I'm lucky that I live in an urban area where there is so much diversity that people are simply surprised, not too judgemental, when I tell them I don't want kids, and have already had my tubes tied. You might try looking for a company that has a more open-minded feel than your current company.
Good luck!
I personally never want children. I think it's my choice whether I want to have children or not and I enjoy my life and body the way they are. I don't want to go through 9 months of having a fetus toll my food, my comfort, and my health, only to go through hours of labor and pain, stretching my body. It's my decision - I hate being told I'm missing out or that I'm making the wrong decision. I'm just not looking for that ';extra element';. I'd suggest you just tell anyone who asks ';Kids just aren't my thing,'; and you don't have to explain any farther. It's your decision and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
It shouldn't matter if you choose not to have children. Many people make that choice.
Sooooo, exactly what is the problem? Im childfree and the only area where this is a problem is that co-workers want to say they need to be off such and such a holiday because of the kids, and they expect that I should work the holidays because I dont, but I handle that by standing up for my right to have holidays off too and telling them that I may not have children but I do have a family, and I deserve the same consideration.
Political stance?
If someone asks if you have kids, just say ';no'; and change the subject.
Why would they discuss this, anyway?
I'm childfree by choice. I don't understand your situation. If someone asks if you have children, and you say no, do they actually ask you why not? I never had people ask me why not. How do these rude people know you made a decision to not have children? What if you really wanted them, but couldn't have them, and you might just break down if the subject is brought up? You must work with some very insensitive clods, OR you offer more information than they needed or wanted to know.
Exactly who would be asking you for your ';stance'; on having or not having children? Unless you're working for the catholic church, I can't imagine this is a real issue. How can deciding to not have children be a ';political stance';? And I think if you know people who actually put pictures of fake children in their workspace, that is one scary place to work! I'd suggest putting pictures of your dog in a frame. Or a fake dog if you're also dog-free.
Why are you ';proud'; to be childfree? It's just a choice - nothing to be proud or ashamed of. I'm happy with my choice to not have children, but never thought of being ';proud'; of it. I really think you're making something out of nothing. You're not in high school anymore, you're not judged for not going along with what everyone else does.
The only time childfree vs. childburdened should be an issue is when preferential treatment is given to those who chose to reproduce. Your employer can not discriminate by making you work overtime or on holidays, but not people with kids.
Where I work, we used to have unlimited sick days. Not that you could take off tons of time, but there was no set number of days. It was up to your supervisor if you were abusing sick time. However, people with kids could call in and say ';Muffy has a cold and can't go to school, so I can't come in today';. No problem says management. I could call in and say, ';My car burst into flames on the highway. I'm waiting for the fire dept. to put out the flames so the tow truck can haul it away. I can't come in today';. Management says, ';no problem. Just put in for a vacation day.'; Muffy caused co-worker to miss 30 days a year. No problem, no vacation time lost. Finally, all the other childfree employees (granted, most weren't childfree like me as much as they were so old their kids were grown) got together and demanded a new policy. We now have a PTO system. When Muffy sneezes, it's a pto day. Justice!!!
Next time someone asks if you have kids, do like Nancy said and just say no. Maybe they were just being polite, and making small talk. Not asking for your view of the world. Lighten up.
PS: Some of my friends who thought I'd regret not having children some day, are now envious of the decision I made. My life is so much easier than theirs. They love their kids of course, have had years of grief as well. And by the way, I happen to love children. Just never wanted the responsibility. But I don't normally feel the need to explain that to people.
just tell them its none of their business....
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