I don't care one way or the other about the choices of others. If you want kids, great! If you don't want kids, great!
The only time a problem comes into play is when childless people start getting snarky about people with children or vice versa.
I've run into childless people who want the whole world to be a childfree zone because children are a nuissance (in their opinion) and people with children who think children should go everywhere without any exceptions. Both attitudes are dead wrong.
Kids shouldn't have free reign over the world, neither should adults. Live and let live.
I say, if you don't have kids, try to respect those who do and if you do have kids, try to respect people who didn't follow your same life path. And for goodness sake, don't let the kids run riot at an adult gathering.
Trust me, I know this is hard. I have three kids and two of them have sprouted horns lately. (One reason they won't be going anywhere remotely adult for a while...at least, not til' they straighten up.)Why do parents think childless/childfree people are selfish?
There's an assumed, detestable definition of the word selfish that wouldn't apply here. It's (usually) a very unselfish person that has children, in that a good parent puts their children first. They go without, they maybe turn down the career of a lifetime, they eat at Friendly's instead of elite restaurants now, and shop at thrift shops for themselves so that their kids can wear Osh Kosh. There are plenty of parents that don't meet that criteria though. Not every parent is unselfish.
A person who decides not to have children for the reason they want their career, their free time, their money, peace and quiet, etc. I suppose technically it's ';selfish'; by definition, but not at all in that frowned-upon way. I think it's a mature, responsible, commendable person that would rather not have children, than to have children and still fight to keep everything they ever had/did/wanted before.
i don't think either is in itself selfish. i do think it's selfish when ppl who don't want kids get pregnant anyways and then treat the kid like crap bc they didn't want children. or when they have children bc they think it'll get them attention, or help from the govt., etc.
i imagine ppl think that bc partly jealousy of their freedom, but also bc GOOD parenting requires huge self-sacrificing and basically giving up your whole life for this child, putting their needs before your own always, and that is incredibly UNselfish. Childless ppl don't have to do that, and often times they don't. So childless ppl don't really know that depth of self-sacrifice.
for some that do not have children, they dont understand that being a GOOD parent is the most selfLESS and UNselfish thing a woman can do. and some mothers look at childless women and think they are selfish because they dont want to spend their lives nurturing children..
but i think some women are meant to be mothers, and some are not. if you can distinguish what you are when your young and make that decision to either have a child or not have a child, that makes you unselfish in my eyes.
selfish ones are the ones that have children yet dont take care of them, just use their children for pity, money, (HELLO, octo mom??)
neither is selfish. I am a mother and i love it. my daughter is my everything but some people are not interested in becoming parents and that's okay. it's not for everyone. Some people work and love working so they don't have time to be a parent, others don't like kids and i can't really think of any other reasons ive heard but no one should be judged wether they want to be a parent or decide not to. it's a personal choice.
I see like this: some people are meant to have kids and be parents and their are some people that just aren't meant to be parents.
Either way it's the individuals choice and no one has the right to judge because it's better to not bring kids in this world rather than have kids and treat them like crap.
Because they can't mind their own business. Pure and simple. People have a knowledge for being a Busy Body, and because they have kids themselves it is quite natural to think that ';You are the weird one.'; which is Preposterous. Yes, it is just as Selfish to have kids when it is for the wrong reason. ';Aka: To Please a Mother in Law/Father In Law';, ';To Keep up with your Brother';, ';For Tax Purposes';, etc.etc.
Don't you worry about anyone thinking you are selfish. It is perfectly normal.
Im pro choice. Some people dont want kids, I find myself actually envying my one friend, and all her vacations and freedoms that she has during hard episodes of parenting. Its not selfish to do what you want to do, now to pump out babies as a dog has puppies and give more kids less of a quality life, thats just pure stupidity.
I don't think either is selfish. Some people love kids and want someone to nurture, love, teach, and to be the next generation of their family, and some just aren't the parenting type. It's everyone's choice.
Lol i have never said that those people are selfish please tell me how you can justify that a parent is selfish? We give everything to our kids thank you very much.
No comments:
Post a Comment