Not everyone is wired to have kids, or even to be interested in kids. We don't wish them ill, the fact is we just aren't interested. I always knew I didn't want kids, the same way I don't want a dog or a boat. Nothing wrong with either, they're just not for me.
This is the part of the conversation where people say, ';You can't compare a baby to a dog or a boat!'; Yeah, I can, because they all have the same desirability factor for me. (Note: FOR ME being the operative words.) We're glad those little fingers and first noises make you all gooey inside--everyone should be happy with the results of their choices in life--but it's just not for us.
My life is full, I have a loving husband and plenty of friends to hang out with and things to do and am living my life the way I want to. Why would you assume CF automatically equals lonely? (Although I think many CF are more content with their own company than the average person is.) I think a lot of people see us like Miss Havisham from the book Great Expectations, pining away behind heavy drapes in a dusty room and cursing the world. It ain't so. We just choose to devote our lives to something other than procreation.Who thinks a childfree lifestyle would be very lonely?
Wow, I wish I could be like you (best answer). I wish I was as happy with live as you are with yours. Many times I feel like giving up and ending it all. And sometimes I envy what people have, which isn't really a good thing and I shouldn't be doing it! I don't want kids either but I see all these
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people in their late teens and early twenties (I'm in my late) having kids and I'am feeling like ';did I miss something?'; why would they want kids?!
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Im 29 married for 4 years and Im childfree. Were not lonely infact were very happy, fulfilled, successful in our careers. Less worries.
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My childfree life has never been lonely, and I'm in my late 40's now. I have friends, a significant other, family, a social life, pets, and I'm far from lonely.
What makes me sure about my decision? Things like going to Wal-Mart on a Saturday. : )
The thought of being a parent gives me extreme anxiety and always has.
Added: No one needs kids to experience ';unquestioning love'; or to have done something in their life that mattered. I'll also never have any of the many, many drawbacks of having children.
I'm a 54 year old, childfree woman. I knew when I was 8 that I didn't want children. I have never regretted my decision.
When I was young, I never knew people had children on purpose. I thought pregnancy was a consequence of unprotected sex. When my friends started having babies (on purpose) I was stunned. I couldn't imagine wanting to be saddled with a child. I'm still surprised when people plan babies.
I was married for a short time (I got married to have fun, not to have kids), so that would have been the ideal situation to have kids, but we never tried.
I am in no way lonely. You should know that I'm also an only child, so there are no siblings, nieces or nephews in my life. I have two god-daughters that I think are OK, but I rarely see them. I just have no interest in children. It is what it is, but I'm great with it!
Not everyone is cut out to be a surgeon or a teacher. Furthermore, not everyone is meant to be a parent. I have all the respect in the world for those who do because it seems like the hardest task on earth.
As for me, I am far too busy with family obligations, friends, work, exercise, and hobbies. I am never lonely and in fact I feel the opposite, that I don't have enough ';me time';.
I certainly don't worry about growing old and lonely. I am VERY good to my 10 nieces and nephews.
For me personally: I would hate to be childfree, I wouldn't chose it. But that's because I love and adore kids and being a mother. Childfree = Lonely? Maybe sometimes. But even being a parent can be lonely at some stages. You feel lonely when you are stuck in the house exhausted looking after toddlers. You feel lonely the day your youngest child moves out of home. Loneliness is a normal human emotion and we can't completely avoid it by having children.
If it was my fate to be ''childless'' then I would try to find other ways to be happy and live a rewarding life.
For other people: I think it is good to have a choice. In the old days you had to get married and have kids, or you were a freak to be pitied. These days there are many ways to fill your life and if people prefer no kids, I wish them well. I don't think they are selfish, one of my best school teachers had no children and she was a wonderful, fun and giving woman. Was she lonely? I doubt it, she touched so many lives.
The only thing I don't like about ''childfree'' is the tiny minority who are aggressive and hate parents and kids. Pathetic human beings really, I feel so sorry for their parents. I think they are just a few oddballs on the internet though. Hopefully not a growing trend.
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i don't have any kids till now and i'm 25. i don't wish to have any for the time being, i feel ok this way and i wouldn't want any right now and not for some time now.
i'm not sure if this will remain this way. i'm not sure if i'll change or not. and i don't know how i will feel like or become in the future, with the passage of time.
i haven't even met yet the man i wish to marry.
That is why you have brothers and sisters so they can have the kids then you can love the kids and then give back, sort of like a loan.
When you die you will die rich and your nieces and nephews will be your beneficiaries.......everyones a winner!
I would go nuts if I didn't have my kids or my grandkids for that matter couldn't imagine life with out them.
Media pundits (including loud spoken special interest groups) are inexorably pushing how 'great' it is to live life without kids cluttering things up. You can come home to a totally clean house, eat dinner without arguments, and never, ever worry about Grandma's vase getting broken. They enforce their message with little nudges about how not having kids with constant stories of population overgrowth, %26amp; the high cost of raising kids (currently they claim one will spend over 200,000.00 to raise a child from birth to 21 - not counting the optional car at graduation).
What they fail to add is you also never have that indescribably wonderful warm feeling when you look down at that little bundle squirming in your arms and realize you've just helped bring a life into this world.
Childless adults never receive the unquestioning love a child gives: love that overlooks every fault a person can have, love that erases all the rotten things that happen when they come running up to you, do one of those awesome leaps into your arms, wrap their legs and arms around you and joyously proclaim ';Mommy/Daddy, I wuv YOU!'; .
You don't have bragging rights and you'll never feel that flush of pride when your son/daughter's work takes first/second/no particular prize, or any of the thousand and one accomplishments they'll have that couldn't take place without you giving up a few lousy material things like that second vacation in the islands.
Then there is that day when they announce they've found their life-mate, and you remember your own blissful young love.
In your old age, there is the comfort of your child - now grown into middle age- being there to tell you of their day, to ask your advice, to bring their kids to see their gram/gramps....
and finally, when your time on this earth is come to a close, you can look back down the path of life and know that at least one thing you did really mattered.
We lost four children at a young age, and had one son (now married to a wonderful woman), and adopted a special needs son who sucked up huge amounts of time and money, and we wouldn't trade a single second for the love we got from my boys. We never had a clean house, and we ran our cars into the ground. We've never had a vacation anywhere, and our closets have just the basics....and we feel like the richest people in the world.
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